She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
