She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I don't want my vagina anymore.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
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