i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
