Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(860): View more from Connecticut

I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass

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(860): I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass http://tfl.nu/kwec

Replies (24) Good night (1557) Bad night (5343)
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(253): View more from Washington

when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot

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(253): when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot http://tfl.nu/f16k

Replies (10) Good night (810) Bad night (3544)
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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"

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(484): the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?" http://tfl.nu/cfh8

Replies (68) Good night (4440) Bad night (1640)
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(703): View more from Virginia

I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.

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(703): I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm. http://tfl.nu/zuvg

Replies (20) Good night (4812) Bad night (1114)
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(847): View more from Illinois

she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides

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(847): she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides http://tfl.nu/frdu

Replies (51) Good night (12611) Bad night (1249)
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(509): View more from Washington

Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.

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(509): Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico. http://tfl.nu/evuy

Replies (13) Good night (5726) Bad night (1200)
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(501): View more from Arkansas

we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"

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(501): we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american" http://tfl.nu/1xh1

Replies (26) Good night (8117) Bad night (1198)
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(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.

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(321): He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector. http://tfl.nu/k71r

Replies (10) Good night (1560) Bad night (596)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?

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(978): do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man? http://tfl.nu/w8vx

Replies (7) Good night (1455) Bad night (442)
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(314): View more from Missouri

I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.

(1-314): View more from Missouri

Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.

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(314): I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault. (1-314): Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush. http://tfl.nu/fjsh

Replies (5) Good night (1431) Bad night (815)
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(678): View more from Georgia

Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.

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(678): Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony. http://tfl.nu/3z52

Replies (3) Good night (835) Bad night (574)
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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.

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(724): You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures. http://tfl.nu/2cky

Replies (1) Good night (894) Bad night (406)
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(309): View more from Illinois

My penis needs a shock collar

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(309): My penis needs a shock collar http://tfl.nu/qzdc

Replies (8) Good night (692) Bad night (436)
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(817): View more from Texas

If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.

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(817): If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text. http://tfl.nu/t6cn

Replies (1) Good night (570) Bad night (348)
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(517): View more from Michigan

So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...

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(517): So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys... http://tfl.nu/celz

Replies (4) Good night (489) Bad night (291)

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