Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Randomize