I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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