Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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