she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Randomize
