took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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