i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
