Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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