I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
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