Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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