You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
