Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
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