We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Randomize
