my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
