You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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