I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
I wish my penis had an off switch
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.