i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
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