Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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