# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Randomize
