Those balls look pretty dangerous.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
