Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Randomize
