I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Randomize
