I like to think it a success when the cops are called
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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