What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
