I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
