we're blogging at a bar
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
The uberlube is also flammable
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
