What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
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