Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Randomize
