I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
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