i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
