He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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