But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
