I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
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As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
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