it's like iHOP with fire
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
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