I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
