a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Randomize
