Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
We left the knife in your bed.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
