Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
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