Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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