maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
