I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I wanna passion pit in your ass
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Randomize
