just tell him i said nine months
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Randomize
