I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
