pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
