Just mADE A PArabola og urine
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
