If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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