I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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