Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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